Hello, Ducks!
Starzina Starfish-Browne here with your
Eric’s! Daily! Horoscope! for GoodPieRupeeTuesday, September Ninest, 2014.
Happy Birthday to Joe who turns twenty-four
today right here in The City That Loves You (On Your) Back.
Happy Birthday also to Ashwin, who also turns
twenty-four today, also right here in The City Of Brotherly Love Handles.
Happy Birthday also too to Cas, who also too
turns twenty-four today somewhere in Delawhere.
Faithful Gentle Readers who do not nakedly
skim will recall that yesterday, We were shrilled and ignited to be off to see
Tribe of Fools’ Two
Street: A Tale of Star-Crossed Mummers at The Church of the Crucifixion (which makes
Us giggle every time We type it).
For archival purposes, We shall point out
that We ate some sausages at Brauhaus Schmitz before attending. (Please note that “ate some sausages” is NOT
a euphemism. (Nor, for that matter, is “Brauhaus
Schmitz”, but you probably already knew that. (Lest you fear that this story is
headed somewhere untoward, please know that Our sausage consumption plays absolutely
no role in the rest of today’s e-pissode, and is only included here as these
e-pisstles also function as a diary for Us.)))
Now, if this were (subjunctively) a typical
Eric’s!Daily!Horoscope! tale, fulfilling Our raison d’ être
of making YouPeople feel better by comparison, it would be all about how Our
expectations were so high that We could
not help but be disappointed.
Wrong, wrong, how laughably wrong.
In case you have been living under a rock, Two
Street is the retelling of some famous guy’s Romeo and Juliet story, using two South Philly gay guys from rival
Mummer brigades.
Long-time Gentle Readers will recall Us waxing
rhapsodic (“waxing rhapsodic” is not a euphemism (“waxing the carrot” IS a
euphemism…but We didn’t say that…PAY ATTENTION!))
about two previous Tribe of Fools shows, Heavy
Metal Dance Fag and AntiHero.
This show is even better than those. It is more tightly scripted, with a well-managed flow between scenes, and a clear trajectory. It is hysterically laugh-out-loud-a-lot funny, while having a number of very important things to say.
Lead actors Zachary Chiero (Ronnie) and Peter
Andrew Danzig (Jules) create
distinctive, definitive wonderfully real characters who are just Everyman
enough to make you realize that you have played both of these roles in your own
relationships before. Plus, they share a chemistry that not only rocked The
Church Of The Crucifixion (hee…We love saying that), but was probably also felt
onstage at any Fringe show performing simultaneously within the city limits.
(Which was no doubt confusing to the folks over at 99 Breakups…)
They are ably supported and abetted by Isa
St. Clair and Peter Smith who, as their respective siblings, create delightfully
complex and funny characters of their own.
One cannot discuss a Tribe of Fools show
without talking about the movement…and what brilliant movement it is! We mistakenly thought, prior to Our arrival
at the actual show, that choreographer Tim Popp was playing one of the
star-crossed lovers. As it turns out, he
is in the show, in the personality of
his dazzling choreography.
Script-wise, keep your ears tuned to the
Mummers parade newscaster commentary between scenes. A lot of it will be
drowned out by laughs (it is, regrettably but necessarily, pre-recorded), but
what you do hear of it will be really, really funny.
Kudos to director Terry Brennan, the rest of
the ensemble, and, indeed, everyone involved with the production (especially
costume designer Becca Austin).
And now, for those NOT involved with Two Street:
It is a criminal affront to taste and decency
that there was so much as ONE empty seat at last night’s performance. How DARE you not be at this show! It only plays through Saturday, and We will
not be pleased if We hear of any unsold tickets remaining. Get ‘em here, and get ‘em NOW, people: http://fringearts.com/event/two-street-a-tale-of-star-crossed-mummers-12/
(We are so proud of Ourself for getting through
that entire description without mentioning all of the lovely eye candy in Two Street… oooops!)
In other Fringe news, The
WaitStaff Sh!ts The Bed!
was SOLD
OUT (and very well-received) both Friday
and Saturday nights, so if you want to curry favor with Us by showing up (because mmmm….curried favor) get your
tickets now and/or quick, fast and in a hurry:
Said show also contains, speaking of
LovelyAndTalented, a sketch by a former student from the sketch comedy class at
which We assist, so We are herewith giving a shout-out to TheLovelyAndTalented
Danny. More on that show here: https://www.facebook.com/events/631876713594265/
*****************
Speaking of eye candy, (howZZAT for a segue?), here is a flashback to
Our FIRST Virgo video, the one with the naked angel:
In other other news, We have
Our schedule at the Murder Mystery Factory for September. We will be performing this Friday, September
12 and Friday, September 26. If you are
interested in seeing Us perform in same, holla at Us. (For those naked skimmers who may not be
aware, We have been promoted to A Position Of Power at the Factory, and so will
be performing somewhat less.)
And
heeeeerrrre’s the HorrorScope:
In celebrity birthday news, in case you were
mistakenly feeling young today, Henry Thomas of E.T. fame? Is forty-three
today.
And now, as the day is galloping away from Us apace, here, in lieu of
call-and-response with the AssHatted Ass(tromalogical) Ho(roscopulist) Kelli is
a reading from Madame Olivia:
Greetings Starzina ~
A warm welcome back to Madame Olivia.
Madame Olivia can see that many people enjoy your company
and she urges you to keep this in mind whenever you strike up a conversation
with somebody you'd like to get to know. Listen to that positive voice inside
instead of the critical one that starts yammering at you. That critical voice
is actually from the culture, not from you. Listen to the positive voice when
you're with that person you've been thinking about. Make your move.
And now, dear Aries, let's talk about the choice that will
soon present itself before you. Which way to go? Madame Olivia advises you to
make a careful analysis and then do exactly as your heart tells you. This way
you can satisfy your inner critic (with those incredibly high standards) and
follow your instinct, which will not lead you astray.
Madame Olivia sees great energy for you around odd numbers.
It has been a pleasure being with you. Madame Olivia wishes
you all the best until we meet again.
Namaste, MotherFuckers.
In gaseousness,
Starzina Starfish-Browne
(Your Your-O-Scopes:
(Meanwhile, why We didn’t think
of this sooner, We’ve got no idea, but better laid than necking, as they say
(and how right they are!). For real live actual ass(tromlaogical)
ho(roscopular) advice, please visit Our good friend AstroGeek here: http://sett.com/astrogeek895/. Our
Own epistular musings are of use to you only insofar as making you feel better by
comparison, but he will give you actual pertinent advice for your very own
lives, based on upon the positions and transitations of all manner of planets,
planetoids, asteroids, Altoids™, hemorrhoids, and other heavenly flotsam,
jetsam, and Jetsons. Plus, he knows all about Uranus!)
*****************************************************************************
Starzina
Starfish-Browne was born in the wagon of a traveling show…well, okay, not
really. She was actually born in Lowake, Texas, the daughter of a beautician
and either a garage mechanic or the town mailman. At sixteen, she escaped her
humble beginnings by running off with Doctor Browne’s Traveling Medicine Show
and, more to the point, Doctor Browne. Following the dissolution of this
unfortunate entanglement (Doctor Browne was a Virgo and Starzina is, of course,
an Aries), which produced a daughter, Starzina entered a contest in Soap Opera
Digest and won a scholarship to Oxford (yes, in ENGLAND), where she earned her
doctorate in the newly-created dual major of Astrology and Human Sexuality.
There is absolutely NO TRUTH to the rumor that Starzina’s second daughter has Royal
blood, despite tabloid photographs allegedly depicting her cavorting on the
Italian Riviera with Princes William and Harry, clad only in Prussian helmets
and armbands of questionable taste. Starzina currently resides with her
daughters in Philadelphia, the City That Loves You (On Your) Back, where she
enjoys Double Coupon Day at the local SuperCruise and “encouraging” the
coxswain of the Penn rowing team.
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