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Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Lido missed the boat that day he left the shack, but that was all he missed, and he ain’t comin’ back


Hello, Ducks!

Starzina Starfish-Browne here with your Eric’s Daily Horoscope for Wednesday, October 05, 2011.

We are keeping it simple today, as We know how easily you all are distracted by shiny things. Starzina’s Time Of The Month Horoscope: Libra has arrived (perfection takes TIME, Ducks) and you can either click to watch it above or share this link with your friends with Libra birthdays:

Here is the horoscope We would have mocked had We (subjunctively) been able to be arsed. Feel free to mock it your own self, and share such mockage with Us if you like.  Happy Hump Day!:

You need to show others the way today — your mental energy helps you see shortcuts and opportunities where others only see confusion. Make sure that your people are paying attention!  Your mind is ready for inspiration, which it will find in many places today. So this is a great day to be stimulated, whether by other people or by a situation you put yourself in. If you can, you should work in groups today. Teamwork has always come naturally for you, and the different voices and attitudes will plant all sorts of fantastic ideas in your head. Even if you have one or two differences of opinion, you’ll have a good time coming to a compromise with someone.  Today find like-minded people to spend some quality time with. You might end up making a new friend that turns into the romance of your life. Broaden your social circle and accept invitations from an unexpected suitor.

 (Your YOUR-O-Scopes:
Starzina Starfish-Browne was born in the wagon of a traveling show…well, okay, not really. She was actually born in Lowake, Texas, the daughter of a beautician and either a garage mechanic or the town mailman. At sixteen, she escaped her humble beginnings by running off with Doctor Browne’s Traveling Medicine Show and, more to the point, Doctor Browne. Following the dissolution of this unfortunate entanglement (Doctor Browne was a Virgo and Starzina is, of course, an Aries), which produced a daughter, Starzina entered a contest in Soap Opera Digest and won a scholarship to Oxford (yes, in ENGLAND), where she earned her doctorate in the newly-created dual major of Astrology and Human Sexuality. There is absolutely NO TRUTH to the rumor that Starzina’s second daughter has Royal blood, despite tabloid photographs allegedly depicting her cavorting on the Italian Riviera with Princes William and Harry, clad only in Prussian helmets and armbands of questionable taste. Starzina currently resides with her daughters in Philadelphia, the City That Loves You (On Your) Back, where she enjoys Double Coupon Day at the local SuperCruise and “encouraging” the coxswain of the Penn rowing team.