(That there was a little Bernadette Peters for your Thursday listening pleasure.)
Greetings, Energetic Retard Incapacitates Caregiver---
(Film at eleven.)
Here is your horoscope for Thursday, October 07, 2010 (So.  Thursday.  Didja miss Us?  Keep those cards and letters pouring in.  Oh, and thanks for all the Hump Day wishes.  Apparently, We should be getting Ourself one of those medic-alert gizmos.  For when We’ve, ya know, fallen and can’t get up.  Of course, those things presumably have somebody on the other end of ‘em, yes?  Or else it’s kind of a rotten trick on Grandma…”Yeah, old lady, if you fall down, you just press this button and WAIT. (Heh-heh-heh.)”):
(At any rate, We have been a little under the weather.  Not physically, mind you; it’s just that We fail to see the need for creepy English murder mystery weather if We’re not gonna be allowed to murder anybody. )
(Meanwhile, leaping into the fray of Those Desirous Of Cheering Us Up is Micro$oft Weird™, which wants to suggest that maybe We might want to consider changing “old lady” to “old woman” or “old person”.  No.  No, We wouldn’t, but thanks for asking.  You are one funny fu(ker. (We, on the other hand, are one FANNY fu(ker, although there’s  absolutely no evidence of that.))
(The major problem around here at the moment is that, with Our show closed, there is absolutely nothing on Our horizon but the cold dark death of winter.  There is, of course, the bright spot that is the holidays (yes, We DO love the holidays…did We mention that almost all of Our Christmas shopping is done?  And much of it is wrapped?  Well, almost all of Our Christmas shopping is done.  And much of it is wrapped.).  However, this year, immediately AFTER the holidays, Something Is Going To Have To be Done.  And, while We’re fairly clear on what that Something is in the abstract, We have precious little clue how it looks in the concrete, although We’re pretty sure We don’t like it.  Sigh.)
(We’ve fallen and We can’t get up.)
(Fortunately, We’re wearing a VERY fetching housecoat.  And bunny slippers.)
(Our-O-Scopes:) 
(Good lord…Our Kelli, who usually flips Us off with five or six barely coherent quasi-sentences, this morning dumped the following in Our email.  As soundly mocking this all could take Us the rest of the month (if not year), We have decided to forego same. We HAVE read the whole mess, however, and clearly Kelli has ceded her perch to someone with A Clue for the day.  We don’t, naturally, expect YOU to read it all, but if you skip down to the very last paragraph, you will get an idea of what We have been asked to contend with.  Jeebus.:
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     | Mercury Quincunx     Mc |       |  |  |  | October 07, 2010     to October 07, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | Your attempts to achieve     one or more of your fondest long-term goals can be greatly aided by the     information that comes to you at this time, so stay alert. This information     could come in positive or negative form, as a tip or a warning, but either     way it will be quite helpful and welcome. You may also receive some news     that creates a bit of minor distress and compels you to reexamine some     position you've taken regarding your career or work in the world. Be open     to reassessing your ideas and motivations; remember, the best work you can     do in this life is to grow, learn and progress. This is the right time to     think things through, even things you thought were already settled, but it     may not be a good time for coming to any new, definite conclusions. Try to     avoid signing contracts at this time or doing anything else that binds you     to one result or course of action; you might well regret it later if you     don't. This is simply a time for gathering, organizing and storing     pertinent information. Delay direct negotiations for a time when you are     feeling more clear-headed and decisive about your direction in life. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Mercury     Semisextile Neptune |       |  |  |  | October 07, 2010     to October 09, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | You find it more     difficult than usual to focus on mundane details and problems. Anything     that you must use a great deal of energy to focus on -- financial issues,     anything to do with numbers or research and so on -- seems to be a     distraction, and you would rather not do it if you don't have to. If you     can, delegate this type of task to someone else whose powers of     concentration are greater than yours. Clear your schedule if at all     possible -- you might even want to call in sick at work, even if you're feeling     fine, so that you can have as much time as possible to spend doing what you     are really in the mood for: indulging in your imagination and seeing where     your currently vivid fantasy life leads you. Your inner voice is speaking     loudly at this time. Art, beauty, fantasy and whim are all strong     components in your life, both waking and sleeping. You are impressionable     and creative; if you are a writer or an artist of any kind, be sure to keep     a pen or pencil and a pad of paper handy so you can jot down your ideas or     any sketch images that pop into your head. If you absolutely must work,     spend the day brainstorming with your team. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Mars Square Asc |       |  |  |  | October 07, 2010     to October 10, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | The current energy lends     itself to stormy personal relationships. Your connections with those people     with whom you interact on a daily basis are strained at this time. You feel     edgy and impatient, short on compromise. You may feel somehow that your     personal views are being attacked by another and that you must defend them     heartily in order to defend your own honor. This is not a good time to try     to come to an agreement with someone, or even a compromise. You may,     however, have to have it out with someone -- a lover, a business partner or     someone else with whom you are working on a big, important project.     Sometimes, arguments are necessary for clearing the air. It is not likely     to be any fun but it will help to alleviate the tensions you and the other     person are storing up inside yourselves. That, in turn, will help later,     when you are more ready to try to work things out to your mutual     satisfaction. If either of you has allowed your tensions to be stored up     and inflamed, compromise will be unmanageable. Be clear in your     representations of yourself and your needs, but try not to be hurtful. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Saturn Semisextile     Neptune |       |  |  |  | September 25, 2010     to October 11, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | You are more aware of     others' needs and feel more willing to give of yourself, your time and your     efforts. Cooperation with others on charitable works is highlighted. You     are likely to find yourself involved with others in an activity designed to     benefit some needy group of people, or you engage in a goodwill activity     such as making improvements in degenerated neighborhoods or other neglected     areas in your community. Take advantage of opportunities to share with     others in noble and charitable causes. The opportunity may present itself     but you may turn it down if you are not attuned to the possibilities of     this time. Also, if you have had an idea for helping some neglected or     needy situation in your community but have not been sure how or when to     approach the issue, now is the time when your efforts will be met with     interest and support. The current energy is not extremely powerful and the     results may not bring you tangible rewards, but the effects could be quite     significant, meaningful and important from a spiritual perspective. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Uranus Semisextile     Sun |       |  |  |  | September 19, 2010     to November 26, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | Your routine shifts into     a happier, more energetic mode during this time. While the change is     subtle, you will notice that your pace will be stepped up just a bit.     Sensing that something interesting is about to happen, you become slightly     anxious or restless. The effect is so slight, though, that the feelings     will not be distressing at all. You're in no way overwhelmed; it's more     like you're pleasantly aware of the quiet shifts you're feeling. You'll     have a nice time with this current energy, meeting new and delightful     people who may become important friends. You share with these new people an     enthusiasm and positivity, and your time with them will be pleasing and     well-spent. Time will fly as you become acquainted with these new people,     talking and laughing, perhaps taking in a movie or art opening together or     just having a bite to eat. You get along so well because you're feeling     less rigid than usual. Activities involving your career go off without a     hitch. It seems as though all doors are unlocked and all obstacles are     removed, and you're able to move forward on projects that at first seemed     buried in paperwork and wrapped up in red tape. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Neptune     Semi-square Venus |       |  |  |  | October 04, 2010     to December 10, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | Your romantic     relationships incorporate a bit of illusion, idealism and fantasy now. You     may toy with the idea of living out some of your fantasies. Your     imagination is more vivid than usual and you tend to project your fantasies     onto others; consequently you have trouble seeing them in a clear,     objective light. You also tend to be evasive with others. This combination     of factors could lead to disappointments and frustrations in your love     life. If you are married or intimately involved with someone, you could     become dissatisfied with the other person. Alternatively, you may     experience a sort of second honeymoon during this time and find yourself     falling in love all over again. Either way, you want some magic in your     romantic life and if you can't get it, you will be dissatisfied with the     relationship. Rather than ending a relationship abruptly, be open and     honest about your feelings with the other person. Evasive and secretive     behavior will only cause trouble and heartache for all involved. Similarly,     avoid major commitments like marriage until your head is clearer. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Pluto Square     Mercury |       |  |  |  | August 02, 2010 to     October 25, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | During this time period     your thinking is intense and penetrating. You are impassioned about your     ideas. You tend to have a one-track mind and you talk to others about your     interests whether they are interested or not! Refrain, if you can, from     trying to talk others into your point of view. You may be obsessed with a     specific idea and fail to see some of the broader issues or the overall     context. You can be persuasive but don't try to influence others who are     not interested in what you have to say; also, try not to be dogmatic and     inflexible in your thinking. This is a good time for any kind of research     or in-depth study. You become involved in studies that probe to a deep,     hidden level that you previously have not been aware of. The nature of the     studies varies according to your personal interests, but whatever area you     become involved in, you pursue with intensity and a great desire to uncover     the underlying motivations and causes behind the appearances. You want to     know what really makes something tick. Some of your previous assumptions     and understandings could be charged by what you discover. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Pluto Trine Pluto |       |  |  |  | May 29, 2010 to     December 16, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | You've reached a point in     your life at which it feels necessary to reflect on your collected     experiences. During this time you will experience a gradual, subtle     maturation of your attitudes and overall approach to life. You are more in     tune with your spirit, your needs and your connection to the universe and     its rhythms. Make changes that allow you to spend more time doing the     things that you really enjoy, the kinds of activities to which you are     instinctively attracted to, rather than doing what serves your more worldly     ambitions. Needs for security and for doing what's right fall by the     wayside in favor of what will make you feel empowered as an independent     individual, as a soul that is part of a larger whole. You are willing to     sacrifice some material benefits in exchange for the opportunity to live     the kind of life that will suit your temperament and interests. Wisdom and     transcendence permeate your presence and others can sense the peace and     assurance that you're feeling. Listen to your instincts and your life will     tend to fall into alignment with your true inner nature. You feel more     contented, more in your own element. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Pluto Conjunct     Jupiter |       |  |  |  | June 05, 2010 to     December 11, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | You feel an overwhelming     need to expand your horizons and break free from the limitations of your     present lifestyle, since you feel hemmed in by surroundings and people that     are too simplistic, narrowly-focused or petty. You are also more     adventurous, confident and willing to spread your wings to explore new     possibilities at this time. This shift in attitude is accompanied by a much     more liberal (and perhaps extravagant and less ethical) approach to life.     You are more willing to borrow money and spend savings in order to have the     things you feel are necessary to enjoy a life of greater prosperity and     freedom. You also travel a lot and mix more easily with people of different     social, religious and ethnic backgrounds. Your view of life is expanding,     as is your image of yourself. You see yourself becoming integrated into a     more prosperous, liberal, expansive circle of people. The changes in your     attitude are just as important as any external changes. You drop many     negative attitudes that have previously limited your potential for growth.     Try not to be pompous at this time, however. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Pluto     Sesquiquadrate Uranus |       |  |  |  | August 20, 2010 to     October 08, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | Unexpected upsets and     changes occur; you could suddenly move or change jobs. Be careful that you     aren't being impulsive; restlessness and being tired of your same old routine     could prompt you to make rash decisions. Make changes only if a better     opportunity arises, because changes may occur that you didn't determine     yourself! The energy at work now is somewhat unstable and has potential to     turn explosive. Be careful while driving your car or during any other     activity that requires attentiveness, as bursts of impatience make you more     accident-prone than usual. On a more positive note, this is a good time to     free your creativity, especially if it has been dormant for some time. You     should be breaking free from old habits and becoming more spontaneous and     lively. You can discover new creative abilities and learn to improvise. A     youthful spirit of spontaneity is trying to come forth, but be certain that     you don't pursue some area or activity solely out of a desire to be seen as     quirky or different by your peers. Make changes that will benefit you on a     deep level. |       |       
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     |  |  |  |       |  |  |  | Asc Sesquiquadrate     Mc |       |  |  |  | October 07, 2010     to October 07, 2010 |       |  |  |  |  |       |  |       |  | Your career and overall     direction in life reach a turning point. You no longer want to do just what     is practical, secure and logically correct; instead you want to pursue the     things that mean something to you. If your job does not express your deeper     talents and interests, you may make a job change or you may become more     involved with a hobby that is more personally rewarding and motivating than     your job. This is a time of questioning your basic values. You must make     any necessary changes to get your life to match up better with your inner     feelings and instincts, even if some sacrifices must be made. For example,     you may decide to accept a lower salary in order to pursue a career that is     more meaningful and exciting to you. Try not to become fanatical about     following your inner instincts if common sense tells you that your pursuit     is impractical. Become aware of your inner purpose. Develop a realistic     plan for achieving whatever is truly important to you. Avoid the tendency     to become pushy or one-tracked in pursuit of your personal goals. |       |  |  | 
Cowgrass…it’s what’s for dinner)
 
That's a lot of horoscope for one day. I'm not even sure how to read that...
ReplyDeleteI *KNOW*! Of course, when you look at it, it's for all different periods of time, but still...all in one day, with no special preface?
ReplyDeleteI might read that...if I was an Aries. Sadly I am not, so all that will have to be for someone else.
ReplyDeleteSlacker.
ReplyDelete