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Hello, Ducks!
Starzina Starfish-Browne here with your
Eric’s! Daily! Horoscope! for GoodPieRupeeTuesday,
September Tenf , 2013. Happy birfday to Our granddaughter, Mo’Niques, who turns
twenty-four today. People frequently ask Us such questions as “How is it
possible that both you and your granddaughter are twenty-four?” To which
We respond, “Blah-blah-blah time machine, blah-blah-blah credenza, you’re
nakedly skimming this crap and that’s the best question you can come up
with? Whatevs.”
The preceding has
inspired Us to imagine that perhaps We should add an FAQ section around
here. Perhaps more people would tune in more faithfully if We had a
section devoted to Fierce African Queens.
Happy
Birthday also to Patrick, who turns twenty-four today in New York (the one in
New York, not the one in…wait, what?), and to Jillian, who turns twenty-four
today somewhere in Greater Bostonia, and to Brian, who turns twenty-four today
in Washington. DC. (We say that, apparently, to distinguish it
from Washington AC. And Washington
AC/DC.)
Do
We know people in all the best places, or what?
It
occurs to Us that We have been remiss in not re-sharing Our other Virgo video with you, the one with
the hawtt almost-nekkid angel in it. So
here ya go:
It
being Fringe Festival time, One can see theater pretty much 24/7 here in The
City Of Brotherly Love Handles.
Consequently, We found Ourself last evening at The Church Of The
Crucifixion to see Terry Brennan in Tribe of Fools’ Antihero. As it turns out, Terry isn’t IN the show, he
directed it, so We only saw him before and after.
We
are telling you all of this because you really and truly need to run and not
walk to get some of the few remaining tickets to this show. It closes, for some reason, this Saturday. (Naturally, you also need to get tickets to
OUR show, info re which follows. But
then, you knew that already. (Didn’t
you?))
We
do so love going to see Tribe of Fools’ shows, because they are the one company
where We are guaranteed never to be jealous that We are not in the show. Mainly because they do such physical work
that, were We (subjunctively) to be cast, We would be dead five minutes into
the first rehearsal. (Note to Self: meet
with Terry to discuss possibility of playing quadriplegic wheelchair-bound
character in next year’s Tribe of Fools Fringe show. (Never mind…they’d
probably make him Evel Knievel.))
The
show is set in and around a comic book store here in The City That Loves You
(On Your) Back, and deals with such themes as Taking The Law Into One’s Own
Hands, Doing The Right Thing, and the Philadelphia Parking Authority. The script is really, really funny, smart,
and literate. We don’t want to give
anything away, but We would particularly enjoy seeing how someone actually
typed out one of the best displays of Inarticulate Rage We have ever seen.
The
direction and fight choreography are brilliant.
Even the set changes (and those of you who know Us well know how We loathe watching set changes) work.
The
acting, in addition to being acrobatic (they are doing something called
Parkour, because the show is about superheroes, and Peter Parkour was
Spiderman, or something), is stellar across the board, with finely drawn (and
often, quickly finely drawn)
characters full of really fun quirks and tics.
The
three principals were uniformly fine. As
the (anti)hero, Peter Smith used every crayon in the box to create a
fully-realized three-dimensional vigilante. Colleen Hughes was electric, and
Kyle Yackoski was a revelation.
Among the ensemble (who
were not really much less principal than the principals), We would have to
single out Zachary Chiero as the comic book store owner, mainly because he made
the most out of what seemed like the least material. Also because he had the funniest dance move. Carolina Millard had some fine moments as
crime victims. Leah Holleran’s police
officer found all the funny in the silences in between the text as well as in
the text. And Tim Popp’s 12-year-old boy
walked off with the funniest set piece in the show. (We won’t spoil it by telling you what it
is. Because you’re buying tickets RIGHT
NOW, aren’t you? http://fringearts.ticketleap.com/antihero/#view=calendar
)
(As a bit of trivia, We shall point out that,
in a SitOnMyFaceBook discussion this summer, John Zak and We helped select the
music for the curtain call.)
Speaking of Uranus, up until Sunday, We were slaving and toiling to open Our Own show, Looking for Uranus: Starzina Starfish-Browne’s Comeback Tour. It went WAAAAYYY better than We could have ever expected, except for the fact that many of you were not there. Let’s fix that, shall We? Please go and buy tickets now. We’ll wait.
Also,
tell your friends, etc. We have been a
little preoccupied with, ya know, making there be a SCRIPT for the damn thing
that We haven’t quite been the lean, mean publicity machine We might otherwise
have been.
(That
paragraph works best if you pronounce that last “been” as “bean”. You DID pronounce that last “been” as “bean”,
didn’t you? If not, We’ll wait whilst you
go back.)
There
is also a SitOnMyFaceBook event here: https://www.facebook.com/events/706806152678843/ for your
convenience in sharing on that platform.
And
here is the HorrorScope:
In
celebrity birthdays, today is Ryan Phillippe’s birthday. In addition to his many fillums, he is
notable for his inclusion on Our list of celebrities whose underwear We would
like to be reincarnated as.
And now, thanks to Our Gentle Reader Donny for
supplying Us with this, which We shall offer up in lieu of call-and-response to
AssHat Kelli’s ass(tromalogical) ho(roscopulations) today, as We have Things To
Do. It is safe for work. Enjoy!
http://gayboysguidetothezodiac.blogspot.com/2012/12/your-sign-as-summed-up-by-gifs.html
In gaseousness,
Starzina Starfish-Browne
(Your Your-O-Scopes:
(Meanwhile, why We didn’t think of this sooner, We’ve got no idea, but
better laid than necking, as they say (and how right they are!). For
real live actual ass(tromlaogical) ho(roscopular) advice, please visit Our good
friend AstroGeek here: http://agskylab.blogspot.com/. Our Own
epistular musings are of use to you only insofar as making you feel better by
comparison, but he will give you actual pertinent advice for your very own
lives, based on upon the positions and transitations of all manner of planets,
planetoids, asteroids, Altoids™, hemorrhoids, and other heavenly flotsam,
jetsam, and Jetsons. Plus, he knows all about Uranus!)
*****************************************************************************
Starzina
Starfish-Browne was born in the wagon of a traveling show…well, okay, not
really. She was actually born in Lowake, Texas, the daughter of a beautician
and either a garage mechanic or the town mailman. At sixteen, she escaped her
humble beginnings by running off with Doctor Browne’s Traveling Medicine Show
and, more to the point, Doctor Browne. Following the dissolution of this
unfortunate entanglement (Doctor Browne was a Virgo and Starzina is, of course,
an Aries), which produced a daughter, Starzina entered a contest in Soap Opera
Digest and won a scholarship to Oxford (yes, in ENGLAND), where she earned her
doctorate in the newly-created dual major of Astrology and Human Sexuality.
There is absolutely NO TRUTH to the rumor that Starzina’s second daughter has
Royal blood, despite tabloid photographs allegedly depicting her cavorting on
the Italian Riviera with Princes William and Harry, clad only in Prussian
helmets and armbands of questionable taste. Starzina currently resides with her
daughters in Philadelphia, the City That Loves You (On Your) Back, where she
enjoys Double Coupon Day at the local SuperCruise and “encouraging” the
coxswain of the Penn rowing team.
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