And those Hollywood nights in those Hollywood hills

Greetings, Eastern Return Infuriates Coast---


Here is your horoscope for Wednesday, April 21, 2010 (Gracious hello, Gentle Readers! It would appear that We have not spoken with you since last Hump Day. We trust you have been humping along, as one does. We Our Own Selves Personally were in California. El Lay, to be precise. Celebrating the twenty-fourth anniversary of Our nativity with swimming pools and movie stars. Speaking of natal anniversaries, happy belated birthday to Nima, who turned twenty-four yesterday while We were flying the friendly skies on Our return.):


(We have SO much to tell you all! But, as We are still readjusting to Our Own Personal time zone, We suspect that We shall be telling you in dribs and drabs over the next week or so. Lettuce first just tell you that We were staying here, which is possibly the only establishment advertising itself on the WorldWideInterWebNetz whose pixtures don’t lie. Speaking of pixtures that don’t lie, Our two Eric’s Daily Horoscopes Pixtures Du Jour Au Jus Couchez Avec Moi Madame Pompadour would involve Our very Own Personal celeb sightings (are We alarmed that Micro$oft Weird™ recognizes “celeb” as a word? We most assuredly are.) Yes, boyzzzz and gurrrlllzzz, We smelled Isaiah Mustafa! (He did NOT smell like Old Spice™.) He was the guest caller at g@y bingo at  Hamburger Mary's WeHo , which was hostessed by Our other celeb sighting, Our friend Willam Belli. (We would apologize for putting Isaiah on top of Willam, but We suspect that Willam won’t mind.) Did We mention that We won a round of bingo? Well, We did.)


(Merde, il pleut. And We have about a kabillion errands to run out in the universe today, d@mmit.)


(This may be the latest Eric’s Daily Horoscope posting EVAH. It is also Our one-hundredth posting in Bloggonia. So do please leave Us a comment or some such. (Seriously…you may notice that they have taken Our ads away. Well, with those also went the counter that showed Us how many people were reading Us. So We can’t even hear you breathing any more. (If any satisfied WordPress users would care to enumerate the benefits of same, We would be All Ears (Except For Our Big Fat @ssz).)))


(Our Our-O-Scope.)






Financially, things are looking quite promising for you as the Moon complete a lovely grand trine configuration in the skies in just a few days. (Hmmm…We just spent a small fortune in money We really don’t have, We didn’t win PowerBall™ while We were away, and We ain’t got a jawb. Yep, financially, everything’s coming up roses.)


If you're hoping for some good financial news, you might well be in luck. (Or fu(ked. One of those two.)


If you need to work on your self-esteem, (Should We have Our self-esteem steamed, or should We steam it Ourself? Decisions, decisions, long divisions.)


as a lot of Aries do right now, hopefully something will happen to make you feel fabulous about yourself. (Is it just Us, or does “hopefully something will happen” not sound exactly like a plan to you, too?)


And if nothing happens, (As it generally does.)


you might have to do some hard work on yourself and remind yourself what's GREAT about you. (What is all this “yourself” cr@p? So what if We know how GREAT We are? Are We gonna hire Ourself, and pay Ourself a paycheck? @sshat.)


Top tip: Make a list! (Does One put “make a list’ on a list? And, if so, how does that list get made, without a list telling One to make it? Real life, she is complexicated.)






(Your YOUR-O-Scopes:






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what happens at cowgrass stays at cowgrass)