Greetings, Egret Regrets Ingesting Courgettes---
(Because they gave him Courgette’s Syndrome. Heh.)
Here is your horoscope for Saturday, February 13, 2010 (We have to amuse you very quickly this morning, as We are off to a marathon WaitStaff rehearsal. (We would say “of Olympic proportions”, but that would just sound like a desperate effort to be au courant. Also, you would probably think We were talking about Our @ssz.)):
(“Courgette”, meanwhile, is British for “zucchini”. What would possess the Britannians to refer to a perfectly lovely Eye-talian vegetable in French is entirely beyond Us, but, then, a lot of things the Britannians do are inexplicable to Us. However, in this particular instance, they have afforded Us the opportunity to end a paragraph with Prince Harry n@ked, so We are grateful. Prince Harry naked.)
(Did We really just do that? Sigh. Well, at least it kept Us from getting all caught up in a discussion of grammar, style, and etymology which, as you can see from today’s pixture, is serious bidness. Entomology, on the other hand, is about bugs.)
(Speaking of naked princes, the WaitStaff’s post-VD sketch comedy show Desperate and Dateless plays for one night only at the World Café Live at 7:30 on Friday, February 19th, and you can buy your tickets here: http://tickets.worldcafelive.com/eventperformances.asp?evt=3418 . Because if you wait much longer to buy them, the show will have already happened, and you’ll be shelling out money for a useless piece of paper. And wouldn’t that seem a little foolish?)
(Our-O-Scope…)
Hi, All! (Since when is Our name “All”? Our @SSZ’S name may be “All”, but even that’s a bit presumptuous. After all, who the h3ll are you, Prince Harry naked?)
It's Valentines weekend (Scr3w that noise. VD is tomorrow, and that’s it. It’s Prince Harry naked weekend, and you cannot convince Us otherwise.)
(The Relevant Adz Generator is gonna love Us today!)
and the outlook is good. (See, now you’re expecting a “Prince Harry naked” joke. So We’re going to refrain. Now THAT’S comedy!)
If your romance is in trouble, (It’s nothing a little Prince Harry naked wouldn’t cure. (Remember back when Prince William was the cute one and this would have been all about “Prince William naked”? Then all of a sudden he turned into his dad and, trust Us, no one has ever uttered the words “Prince Charles naked”.))
(Whew! That’s a lotta stuff about one naked Prince or another. (You’re thinking about little red Courgettes now, aren’t you?))
(Heh. See how all y’all thought that was just random insanity, and We tied it all up together? Do not attempt this at home.)
then it really must be in some serious trouble because the Stars are looking very positive. (Especially Paul Lynde. We are thinking he’s had work done.)
If you're infatuated with someone and you're thinking about declaring your love - no guarantees but you have excellent stars for it! (Okay, We’re just gonna wrap this up and go start sexting naked Prince Harry. L8r g8tors.)
(YOUR-O-Scopes:
http://www.humorscope.com
do you have Prince Cowgrass in a can?)
(Because they gave him Courgette’s Syndrome. Heh.)
Here is your horoscope for Saturday, February 13, 2010 (We have to amuse you very quickly this morning, as We are off to a marathon WaitStaff rehearsal. (We would say “of Olympic proportions”, but that would just sound like a desperate effort to be au courant. Also, you would probably think We were talking about Our @ssz.)):
(“Courgette”, meanwhile, is British for “zucchini”. What would possess the Britannians to refer to a perfectly lovely Eye-talian vegetable in French is entirely beyond Us, but, then, a lot of things the Britannians do are inexplicable to Us. However, in this particular instance, they have afforded Us the opportunity to end a paragraph with Prince Harry n@ked, so We are grateful. Prince Harry naked.)
(Did We really just do that? Sigh. Well, at least it kept Us from getting all caught up in a discussion of grammar, style, and etymology which, as you can see from today’s pixture, is serious bidness. Entomology, on the other hand, is about bugs.)
(Speaking of naked princes, the WaitStaff’s post-VD sketch comedy show Desperate and Dateless plays for one night only at the World Café Live at 7:30 on Friday, February 19th, and you can buy your tickets here: http://tickets.worldcafelive.com/eventperformances.asp?evt=3418 . Because if you wait much longer to buy them, the show will have already happened, and you’ll be shelling out money for a useless piece of paper. And wouldn’t that seem a little foolish?)
(Our-O-Scope…)
Hi, All! (Since when is Our name “All”? Our @SSZ’S name may be “All”, but even that’s a bit presumptuous. After all, who the h3ll are you, Prince Harry naked?)
It's Valentines weekend (Scr3w that noise. VD is tomorrow, and that’s it. It’s Prince Harry naked weekend, and you cannot convince Us otherwise.)
(The Relevant Adz Generator is gonna love Us today!)
and the outlook is good. (See, now you’re expecting a “Prince Harry naked” joke. So We’re going to refrain. Now THAT’S comedy!)
If your romance is in trouble, (It’s nothing a little Prince Harry naked wouldn’t cure. (Remember back when Prince William was the cute one and this would have been all about “Prince William naked”? Then all of a sudden he turned into his dad and, trust Us, no one has ever uttered the words “Prince Charles naked”.))
(Whew! That’s a lotta stuff about one naked Prince or another. (You’re thinking about little red Courgettes now, aren’t you?))
(Heh. See how all y’all thought that was just random insanity, and We tied it all up together? Do not attempt this at home.)
then it really must be in some serious trouble because the Stars are looking very positive. (Especially Paul Lynde. We are thinking he’s had work done.)
If you're infatuated with someone and you're thinking about declaring your love - no guarantees but you have excellent stars for it! (Okay, We’re just gonna wrap this up and go start sexting naked Prince Harry. L8r g8tors.)
(YOUR-O-Scopes:
http://www.humorscope.com
do you have Prince Cowgrass in a can?)
As soon as I read the phrase, "Prince Harry naked," I planned on commenting with a "remember when Prince William," but you beat me to the punch. It's a good thing I didn't skim, huh? Still, nobody would ever say, "remember when Mommie Dearest wasn't a bitch," now would they?
ReplyDeletethis blog makes my day every day. love it.
ReplyDeletehi eric.
marilyn
Hi, Maaaaaaaa!
ReplyDeletehi arnold
ReplyDeletei miss you. i have been keeping up with you on facebook and of course with your fabulous blog. i hope to see one of the waitstaff shows soon. did mary pat tell you that she is in flaming guns of the purple sage.
maaaaaaa
No...when does it go up?
ReplyDeleteit goes up april 23rd. i am in the run of a soldier's play which opening on the 5th of feb. i have been prevented from starting rehearsals for flaming guns due to the snow. arrrrgggghhhh!. mary pat plays
ReplyDeletebig 8 an ex rodeo star who now heals young men from the rodeo who have been injured. of course, she beds them as well she is in her 40's and they are in their 20's. it's hysterical. it is described as a "B" western horror flick for the stage. i can't wait to start rehearsals. i have extended a soldier's play because of the snow. oh boy. i gotta tell you your blog starts my day and i laugh out loud at my desk. my co-workers don't know what's going on.
congrats on buying a house and bummer that your job went away.
mar
it goes up april 23rd. i am in the run of a soldier's play which opening on the 5th of feb. i have been prevented from starting rehearsals for flaming guns due to the snow. arrrrgggghhhh!. mary pat plays
ReplyDeletebig 8 an ex rodeo star who now heals young men from the rodeo who have been injured. of course, she beds them as well she is in her 40's and they are in their 20's. it's hysterical. it is described as a "B" western horror flick for the stage. i can't wait to start rehearsals. i have extended a soldier's play because of the snow. oh boy. i gotta tell you your blog starts my day and i laugh out loud at my desk. my co-workers don't know what's going on.
congrats on buying a house and bummer that your job went away.
mar
it goes up april 23rd. i am in the run of a soldier's play which opening on the 5th of feb. i have been prevented from starting rehearsals for flaming guns due to the snow. arrrrgggghhhh!. mary pat plays
ReplyDeletebig 8 an ex rodeo star who now heals young men from the rodeo who have been injured. of course, she beds them as well she is in her 40's and they are in their 20's. it's hysterical. it is described as a "B" western horror flick for the stage. i can't wait to start rehearsals. i have extended a soldier's play because of the snow. oh boy. i gotta tell you your blog starts my day and i laugh out loud at my desk. my co-workers don't know what's going on.
congrats on buying a house and bummer that your job went away.
mar